Two weeks.
That's how long it took for somebody to start rewriting the GLFL record book.
Milwaukee entered Week 2 at 0–1 after spending the previous week wondering how Kenneth Walker III's 44.1 points ended up on the bench in a loss that could have been avoided.
Apparently, the Mustangs had an answer for that.
Score so many points that lineup decisions become irrelevant.
Milwaukee demolished Cleveland 259.70–153.20, setting a new GLFL record for points in a regular-season game and finishing just 3.3 points shy of the highest score ever recorded in any GLFL game.
Elsewhere, Tucson continued to treat Northern Arizona like its personal property, Los Angeles got 113.5 points from two players, Boston survived an injury scare of its own because Brooklyn's was worse, Miami got into the win column, and Cedar Rapids quietly moved to 2–0.
Week 2 had blowouts, injuries and history.
Let's get into it.
🐎 Milwaukee 259.70, Cleveland 153.20
THE MUSTANGS JUST BROKE THE DAMN RECORD
One week after leaving a victory on the bench, Michael Bautch apparently decided he'd rather not leave anything to chance.
259.70 points.
The previous regular-season record belonged to Tucson, which scored 255.70 in Week 12 last season.
It's gone.
Milwaukee's new mark is also the third-highest score in GLFL history including the postseason, only 3.3 points short of the all-time record.
And this wasn't one ridiculous performance carrying everybody else.
- Jared Goff — 60.05
- CeeDee Lamb — 42.3
- Kenneth Walker III — 32.8
- Dalton Schultz — 32.0
- Rashod Bateman — 26.3
- Christian Elliss — 22.25
Yes, that Kenneth Walker.
This time Walker was safely inside Milwaukee's starting lineup.
Cleveland scored 153.20 and basically spent the afternoon standing underneath an avalanche.
The 106.5-point margin is the fifth-largest regular-season victory in league history and sixth-largest victory overall.
Last week, Milwaukee's lineup management cost them a win.
This week, they nearly broke every scoring record the GLFL has.
Fantasy football is stupid.
💀 Tucson 226.30, Northern Arizona 184.35
Talk First. Score 226 Later.
There was already plenty riding on this one before kickoff.
Northern Arizona entered 1–0. Tucson entered 1–0. The Sugar Skulls had won six straight in the series.
Then the GLFL group chat got involved.
After Tucson GM Mason Bautch warned Boston that he was already looking ahead to their Week 5 championship rematch, Northern Arizona GM Jason Richmond had a suggestion:
“Looking ahead to Week 5 when you're about to take a loss this week is a choice.”
Bautch's response?
“Not in a million years.”
Welp.
Patrick Mahomes scored 58.8. Jaxon Smith-Njigba exploded for 50.5. Jahmyr Gibbs scored 30.3. James Cook III added 27.9.
That's 167.5 points from four players.
Northern Arizona wasn't bad. Tyler Shough scored 40.9, Christian McCaffrey had 28.6 and the Wranglers finished at a respectable 184.35.
Against plenty of teams, that's competitive.
Against Tucson this week?
Thanks for playing.
Tucson won 226.30–184.35.
Make it seven straight Sugar Skulls victories over Northern Arizona.
Richmond also spent part of last week accusing the GLFL media of having Milwaukee GM Michael Bautch “on the payroll” after the 0–1 Mustangs ranked ahead of his 1–0 Wranglers in Marcus Vance's Week 1 Power Ranings.
We're not touching that one.
Marcus can defend himself.
What we will say is this:
If you're going to tell somebody they're looking past you, you probably need to make sure they don't score 226 on you.
And now Tucson can resume looking toward Week 5.
Boston GM Chris Cholka already has.
“We'll both be 4–0 but Week 5 will tell you I have the better team. Just like I did in the championship last year.”
Oh.
We'll be there.
🌴 Los Angeles 207.95, Vegas 168.40
Two Players. 113.5 Points. Good Luck.
We knew this one was getting ugly before Sunday even arrived.
Josh Allen: 71.3.
Amon-Ra St. Brown: 42.2.
That's 113.5 points from two players on Thursday night.
The Wildcats could've almost stopped setting their lineup right there.
Vegas actually got 38.75 from Kirk Cousins and 29.5 from Ja'Marr Chase, but the Knight Hawks never had enough firepower to overcome the crater Allen and St. Brown created.
Los Angeles rebounds from its Week 1 loss and moves to 1–1.
Vegas falls to 0–2.
And after a 4–10 season in 2025, that's probably not the start Dave Nguyen wanted.
🥊 Boston 178.15, Brooklyn 142.75
The Injury Bowl Goes to Boston
This game might have been decided on the opening drive.
Brooklyn starting quarterback Jaxson Dart went down and finished with 3.0 points.
Against the defending champions, that's usually enough to end your afternoon.
Except Boston wasn't immune, either.
Jayden Daniels missed the entire second half, but he'd already produced 26.7 points, and Jonathan Taylor's 38.2 helped the Brawlers survive.
Brooklyn even got a monster 48.0 from Davante Adams, but losing your quarterback almost immediately is difficult to overcome.
Afterward, Brooklyn GM Cory Colvin could only wonder what else could go wrong.
“My team cant catch a break. I got Burrow for my backup QB so not all is lost but I'm 0-2.”
Tucson GM Mason Bautch offered his support.
Sort of.
“Highkey deserve it for starting Dart over Burrow anyway 👀”
Brutal.
Also...not entirely wrong.
Burrow sitting on the Brooklyn bench means Colvin at least has an immediate answer at quarterback if Dart misses time.
It doesn't change the standings.
Brooklyn is 0–2, Boston is 2–0, and the Brawlers' complete reversal of this rivalry continues.
Brooklyn went 11–1 against Boston before 2022.
Since Chris Cholka took over?
The Bolts haven't beaten them.
🔥 Miami 144.40, Philadelphia 124.70
Somebody Had to Win This Game
We have now reached the portion of the recap where everyone agrees never to speak of this game again.
Miami won.
That's the important part.
The Inferno scored 144.40, the lowest winning score of Week 2, and Philadelphia finished with a league-low 124.70.
The Soul also lost Caleb Williams, who finished with only 15.1 points.
Could another 20 points from Williams have changed the result?
Of course.
Would he have scored them?
Maybe.
Welcome to fantasy football. We're not opening that courtroom.
Parker Washington's 21.3 and Josh Downs' 20.2 led an extremely balanced Miami lineup in which nobody reached 22 points.
It wasn't pretty.
It counts exactly the same.
Miami moves to 1–1, while Philadelphia falls to 1–1.
⚔️ Cedar Rapids 209.75, Chicago 180.25
The Titans Are Quietly 2–0
We probably need to start paying attention to Cedar Rapids.
After beating Milwaukee 207–189 in Week 1, the Titans followed it with 209.75 against Chicago.
That's consecutive 200-point performances.
Brock Purdy led the way with 54.35, DeVonta Smith erupted for 36.2, Dalton Kincaid scored 27.5, and even Budda Baker contributed 19 from a defensive slot.
Chicago wasn't terrible.
Dak Prescott delivered 58.55, and Travis Kelce scored 32.1.
But there just wasn't enough behind them.
The Titans are 2–0 and have scored 416.75 points through two weeks.
Maybe they're done being quiet.
🏆 GLFL PLAYERS OF THE WEEK
Offensive Player of the Week
Josh Allen — Los Angeles Wildcats
71.3 points
There were some ridiculous quarterback performances this week — Goff at 60.05, Mahomes at 58.8, Prescott at 58.55 and Purdy at 54.35 — but Allen cleared all of them.
Seventy-one points from one lineup spot changes an entire matchup.
2026 Offensive POW Tracker
- Week 1: Caleb Williams, Philadelphia Soul
- Week 2: Josh Allen, Los Angeles Wildcats
Defensive Player of the Week
Christian Elliss — Milwaukee Mustangs
22.25 points
On a day when Milwaukee's offense was busy breaking records, Elliss quietly supplied the best defensive performance of Week 2.
2026 Defensive POW Tracker
- Week 1: Fred Warner, Cleveland Gladiators
- Week 2: Christian Elliss, Milwaukee Mustangs
🍀 LUCKY DUCK / 💀 UNLUCKY LOSS
Week 1 gave us something to complain about.
Week 2 didn't.
There were no qualifying Lucky Duck wins or Unlucky Losses this week.
Every winner finished in the top half of league scoring. Every loser finished in the bottom half.
For one beautiful week, the schedule actually behaved itself.
Don't get used to it.
🌎 THE PARALLEL UNIVERSE
This is where we stop caring who you actually played.
For every team, we ask one question:
What would your record be if you had played another GLFL team's schedule instead?
After two weeks, this starts getting interesting.
Milwaukee is the obvious example of why.
The Mustangs are 1–1 despite scoring 448.70 points through two weeks. Put Milwaukee against some other teams' opponents and that record could look different.
Meanwhile, a team sitting at 2–0 might discover that another schedule would've handed it a loss already.
Two weeks is still a tiny sample.
But every week from here, this table is going to tell us a little more about who's actually good — and who's enjoying the schedule.
| Team | BOS | BRK | CR | CHI | CLE | LA | MIA | MKE | NAZ | PHI | TUC | VEG |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Boston | 2-0 | 2-0 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 2-0 | 2-0 | 2-0 | 1-1 | 2-0 | 1-1 | 1-1 |
| Brooklyn | 0-2 | 0-2 | 0-2 | 0-2 | 1-1 | 0-2 | 1-1 | 0-2 | 0-2 | 0-2 | 0-2 | 0-2 |
| Cedar Rapids | 2-0 | 1-1 | 2-0 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 2-0 | 1-1 | 2-0 | 2-0 | 2-0 |
| Chicago | 1-1 | 1-1 | 0-2 | 0-2 | 0-2 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 0-2 | 1-1 | 0-2 | 0-2 |
| Cleveland | 2-0 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 0-2 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 2-0 | 1-1 | 1-1 |
| Los Angeles | 1-1 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 0-2 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 2-0 | 1-1 | 1-1 |
| Miami | 1-1 | 0-2 | 0-2 | 0-2 | 1-1 | 0-2 | 1-1 | 0-2 | 1-1 | 2-0 | 1-1 | 0-2 |
| Milwaukee | 2-0 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 2-0 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 2-0 | 2-0 | 2-0 | 2-0 |
| Northern Arizona | 2-0 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 0-2 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 2-0 | 1-1 | 1-1 |
| Philadelphia | 1-1 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 0-2 | 1-1 | 0-2 | 0-2 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 1-1 |
| Tucson | 2-0 | 2-0 | 2-0 | 2-0 | 1-1 | 2-0 | 1-1 | 2-0 | 2-0 | 2-0 | 2-0 | 2-0 |
| Vegas | 1-1 | 0-2 | 0-2 | 0-2 | 1-1 | 0-2 | 1-1 | 1-1 | 0-2 | 2-0 | 0-2 | 0-2 |
☠️ GLFL SURVIVOR
One rule.
Lowest score each week gets eliminated.
No resets. No second chances.
Before Week 2, Vegas GM Dave Nguyen found at least one reason to feel better about his team's place near the bottom of the Power Rankings:
“Guess it could be worse, I could be at the bottom AND eliminated in the survivor pool *cough* Chicago *cough*.”
Chicago GM Darrien Clay did not respond.
Probably wise.
Chicago couldn't be eliminated again this week.
The Slaughter were already dead.
Week 2 needed a new victim.
Philadelphia volunteered.
The Soul's 124.70 wasn't merely the lowest score of Week 2. It was more than 18 points behind the next-lowest team.
Survivor Graveyard
- Week 1: Chicago Slaughter — 147.30
- Week 2: Philadelphia Soul — 124.70
10 teams remain.
Dave Nguyen remains among them.
And somewhere, Darrien Clay is probably waiting.
📊 AFTER TWO
Two weeks into a 14-week regular season, nobody has accomplished anything yet.
But we've learned a few things.
Boston is 2–0. Tucson is 2–0. Cedar Rapids is 2–0.
Milwaukee just produced one of the greatest scoring performances in GLFL history.
Los Angeles reminded everyone what its ceiling looks like when Josh Allen starts throwing haymakers.
Brooklyn and Vegas are already staring at 0–2 holes.
And through two weeks, Milwaukee has scored 449.45 points while Tucson sits just behind at 448.75.
Yes.
0.07 points separate them.
Marcus Vance is going to have fun with the next Power Rankings.
Week 3 is next.
And if 259.70 is what we're doing in September, this season is going to get stupid.